Podcast

J1ST 101: Guest Meg Hunter-Kilmer aka Hobo for Christ and Praying for your Temperament

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Happy New Year, Friends!

Today we’re tackling a fascinating topic, and one that could possibly help you achieve some New Year’s Goals: Praying for Your Temperament.

This episode started as a conversation pre-recording a few months ago… sharing how novenas appeal to some people but for others they are impossible to stick with. “I wonder if that’s a temperament thing…” lead us to Google which lead us to discover Meg Hunter-Kilmer’s blog series on a book called “Prayer and Temperament: Different Prayer Forms for Different Personality Types” by Chester P Michael. Apparently it IS a temperament thing.

But before we get to THAT, a funny backstory of how Meg came To My House to record this episode… Nancy and I found her blog series, thought it was fascinating, and I offered to reach out via Instagram to ask her to be a guest on the podcast. Throughout 2019, Meg kept popping up on my feed via various Catholic folk with the hashtag ‘hobo for Christ,’ so I had been following her for several months and her posts had been hitting home for me (especially this one). I was happy to have an excuse to DM “Heyyy Meg!” After a bit of back and forth, we realized Meg was actually booked for a couple retreats and speaking engagements around my neck of the woods in early December, so she offered to come in person to record. How cool is that? If you’re wondering about her mission and work, we go into it for the first bit of this episode.

BACK to temperaments…In the book, Chester breaks down the human population based on their Myers-Briggs personality types and divides them into four categories: Ignatian, Augustinian, Thomistic, and Franciscan

Why is this important? Well, the Church has a few ways that we are ‘required’ to pray. We all need to go to Mass every Sunday and Our Blessed Mother has asked us to pray the rosary daily, but beyond that, we’re free to pray in the way the feels most comfortable to us. Additionally, if you’re married and you’ve been struggling to pray together (*raises hand*), it could be a temperament thing. Have a listen here and read though Meg’s blog for suggestions of how to work through these differences in prayer styles.

Hoping this helps you achieve a more prayerful (and hence peaceful) New Year!

Your sisters in the small things,

Nancy and Katie

Connect with Meg via her blog, on Facebook, or on Instagram

Prayer and Temperament: Different Prayer Forms for Different Personality Types is available on Amazon right here

J1ST 100: Advent Book Study on Interior Freedom Pt 2

by Nancy Bandzuch · Leave a Comment

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Hey Friends!

Happy Fourth Week of Advent! Today we are wrapping up our book study on Interior Freedom, and sticking with the theme of ‘we can only control what is within ourselves,’ Nancy is without a voice this week so it’s just me, Katie.

This episode focuses on the last third of the book (that first section was so huge!!). And for me, the two words that kept popping out were HOPE and IDENTITY, so they are the focus of the episode as well.

Fr. Jacques Philippe defines hope as, “the virtue of people who know they are infinitely weak and easily broken and rely firmly on God with utter trust… To learn hope, we have to pass through impoverishment.” (p100-101) On page 105, he goes on to say, “lacking hope, we don’t really believe God can make us happy, and so we construct our happiness out of covetousness and lust.” And doesn’t that capture the frantic-ness of “preparation for Christmas?” Our to-do list triples in length, we spend money we may not have (or don’t really need to), say yes to more events and outtings than is our norm (possibly even our comfort level) and why? Because it’s Baby Jesus’ birthday and He wants us to or are we afraid that that Good News isn’t enough?

I think the way the world prepares for Christmas (consumerism, greed, busy-ness, etc.) can also be linked to our need for Identity, the other theme for today. We desperately want others to like us, or at least others to ‘see’ us in some favorable light… This feeds our Social Media addiction (or maybe just mine?). Doing and making things, decorating in certain ways, so we can get that perfect picture worthy of a hundred likes and comments. As modern moms, we are more isolated than any other generation of mothers before us. If we haven’t worked hard to create and maintain our ‘village,’ we’re without one, so we put that time into an online presence which doesn’t actually fulfill our need for friendship and camaraderie. In the words of Fr. Philippe:

One of man’s deepest needs is the need for identity… we are trying to satisfy a need for being by having… or confuse being with doing. (p 121)

It is extremely dangerous to identify ourselves with the spiritual good we are able to do. (123)

Humans beings are more than the sum of the good they can accomplish. They are children of God, whether they do good or cannot yet manage to do anything… this is why humility, spiritual poverty is so precious: it locates our identity securely in the one place where it will be safe from all harm. If our treasure is in God, no one can take it from us. (p124)

So this Advent, my challenge to you is this: some time between Now and Christmas, sit silently for just 5 minutes, holding the creche in your hands, and ask Him “What do you see when you look at me?” Then ask Him to fill you with Hope and Awe at the mystery of the Incarnation.

Also: reach out to a real life friend and make plans for sometime in the next month (if you don’t have something on the calendar already). Maybe it’s just me (introvert and HSP), but in winter, I tend to ‘hibernate,’ despite my need for some (even just a little) interaction with other mommas. This hibernation tends to cause a resurgence of my ‘media addiction,’ which feeds the Mom-Guilt-Monster, so… I am going to be proactive and make some real life plans for interaction and I challenge you to do the same.

To close: I want to share a few of the quotes I shared in this episode that I haven’t already mentioned above. Anyone of these would be amazing to take before the Blessed Sacrament and ‘chew’ on. Here we go:

(on being Hopeful)

Pure-hearted people are not so much those free of all faults and all wounds, as those who put all their hope in God and are certain his promises will be fulfilled. The pure-hearted expect everything from God; they hope in him and in him alone. (p110)

(On gracefully receiving more than we could ever return)

It doesn’t come naturally to us to give freely… nor do we find it easy to receive freely… receiving freely means trusting the giver, with open hearts, It also means abandoning ourselves and it requires a lot of humility…. We commit a fault against this free giving and receiving in our relationship with God or with other people every time we make the good we’ve done into an excuse for claiming a right, demanding gratitude or recompense… learning to give and receive freely requires a long laborious process of re-educating our minds, which have been conditioned by thousands of years of struggle for survival. (p119)

(Words of Christ to an anonymous Spanish spiritual writer)

“Doesn’t God reveal himself as your Abba? Have not I, the Son, taken on your condition at its most wretched? Doesn’t the Paraclete defend you? Believe all this with heart and soul and it will fill you with trust and confidence…. God pitches his tent to dwell with YOU. God is incarnation. God’s new name is Emmanuel, God With Us: God with YOUR reality. Open yourself to it without fear.“

Your sisters in the small things,

Nancy and Katie

PS: If you still haven’t bought the book and this series sparked your interest, it’s available right here.

J1ST 099: 12 Days of Christmas

by Nancy Bandzuch · Leave a Comment

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Following the theme of ‘we can’t control things outside ourselves,’ we’re needing to take a week off from the Advent Book Study of Interior Freedom and instead, we’re sharing something else… The 12 Days of Christmas! Hoping that sharing this week gives you time to prepare a few ‘liturgical living’ activities but also gets you excited for the days following December 25th.

As Catholics, the Christmas Season doesn’t actually begin until the Christmas Vigil and doesn’t end till Epiphany (or if you’d rather, Candlemas on February 2nd). This is a perfect justification to be ‘slow’ putting the decorations away and keep listening to carols, It’s being Liturgically Appropriate.

Today we’re not going to discuss the symbolism of the song “12 Days of Christmas,” but that’s a really neat thing to read about (have a look here). Instead, we’re going to use Mary Reed Newland’s book “The Year and Our Children” to walk through the 12 days of Christmas. There are some fun, easy, and meaningful ways to mark the feast days we celebrate during the Christmas Season.

Following Christmas day, we celebrate the Feast of St. Stephen, the first martyr of our Church. He was one of the first deacons of the Church and gave his life in service of others. One possible activity to mark the feast day is to sing all five verses of “Good King Wenceslas,” since it was on the Feast of Stephen the good king look’d out. You can find the lyrics here. Another idea is to find a way to serve or give to others, just as St. Stephen and St Wenceslas did. Gather up some toys you no longer play with to donate. Serve a meal at a soup kitchen. Make some care packages to hand out to the local homeless.

On December 27th, we celebrate the feast of St. John the Evangelist. It is a traditionally a day to bless your wine. You could ask your parish priest to do so or you can can do so at home with a simple prayer service like this. How did this become a tradition? Well, legend says St. John drank a cup of poisoned wine and did not die because he had blessed it before he drank. Some even claim the poison rose out of the glass in the form of a serpent at the words of blessing. So raise a glass to St. John’s heavenly health today.

During the 12 Days of Christmas, we also celebrate the Feast of the Holy Innocents, the Feast of the Holy Family, New Year’s Eve, the Solemnity of Mary, Mother of God, and Epiphany. We share some ideas for each of these feasts in this episode and we’d love to hear your family’s traditions too! Please share here or on Facebook!

Your sisters in the small things

Nancy and Katie

J1ST 098: Advent Book Study on Interior Freedom

by Nancy Bandzuch · Leave a Comment

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Welcome back from our Thanksgiving break and welcome into Advent! We hope you had a beautiful “Turkey Day” and that the first week of Advent has been somewhat peaceful and prayerful.

During Advent, we will be doing a three part series on the tiny but powerful book, Interior Freedom, by Fr. Jacques Philippe. If you don’t have it yet, you can grab it here and join in on the fun. For this episode, we focused on the first section (through pg 81). Even if you don’t plan on reading the book at all, this episode still has something to offer and we’d love for you to tune in.

We picked this book for Advent because this time of year is full of expectations. Expectations others have of us. Expectations we have of others. Expectations we have of ourselves. Besides all the normal busyness of life, there is all that Needs to Be Done to get ready for Christmas. All these expectations can make us feel penned in and frankly a little grumpy (especially if you are an introvert!!! All the gatherings this time of year are EXHAUSTING).

Enter Fr. Jacques little book on Interior Freedom. We have limited control to no control on what happens exteriorly, but interiorly, we can choose how we react, interpret, and respond.

To illustrate, Father tells a little story about St. Therese (one of his favorite saints who he mentions quite frequently in his writing). St. Therese was often given involved tasks to complete within her community… things that required concentration. Before beginning such a task, she would tell Jesus, “I choose to be interrupted.” In this way, she could lovingly accept interruptions from her sisters and if she was able to work for an entire focused hour or even two, she could thank God for the gift of that time.

There were a few quotes we both loved from this first section of the book:

No circumstance in the world can ever prevent us from believing in God, from placing all our trust in him, from loving home with our whole heart, or from loving our neighbor. (p24)

Our freedom always has this marvelous power to make what is taken from us- by life, events, or other people- into something offered. Externally there is no visible difference, but internally everything is transfigured. (P57)

We are not always masters of the unfolding of our lives, but we can always be masters of the meaning we give them. Our freedom can transform any event into an expression of love, abandonment, trust, hopen and offering… positive things become a reason for gratitude and joy, negative things an opportunity for abandonment, faith, and offering: everything becomes a grace. (P58)

During the season, let us turn our little annoyances, distractions, and disappointments into opportunities to accept and offer it all to the Baby Jesus.

Your sisters in the small things

Nancy and Katie

J1ST 097: Novenas

by Nancy Bandzuch · Leave a Comment

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Hey Friends!

Before we dive into this week’s topic, two quick announcements! One: We will NOT be releasing a new episode next weekend. We’re taking a week off for Thanksgiving. BUT (two), we will be back the First Sunday of ADVENT with the first episode of our book study series! The book we’re reading is Interior Freedom by Fr. Jacques Philippe. You can snag it right here!

This week, we’re discussing another one of those Special Catholic Things: Novenas. What is a novena? Where do we get the tradition? Do I have to start a novena on a particular day (like do the dates matter)?

The root of the word “novena’ is Latin for nine. The original novena was prayed by the apostles and Our Blessed Mother as they waited for the descent of the Holy Spirit at Pentecost. From there, novenas have been composed to many of our Saints and for many of our Feast Days (Christ the King, for example). Usually, a novena is prayed leading up to the Saint’s feast day so that the ninth day of the novena is either the eve of or the actual feast day, but you can begin a novena whenever you’d like!

Pray More Novenas is our favorite go-to for all things novenas and they have a great FAQ page that you can check out and learn even more about our Church’s awesome form of prayer. They also offer a FREE novena reminder service via your email. The prayers of whatever novena is currently “going on” will be sent to your email as a daily reminder. It is So Cool.

One thing that is important to remember about novenas… it can be tempting to believe that God can’t possibly respond ‘No’ or ‘Not right Now’ to your novena prayers, but the fact is, He often does. A novena isn’t a magic formula for a ‘Yes’ and we are powerless to make demands or attempt to control God. Sometimes, prayers are answered in a way that is not immediately apparent or more subtle than what we were expecting. It could be a change of heart, renewed energy, or inspiration to pursue something different.

In this episode, we both share an intention that is near and dear to our hearts right now. We also ask that you share your intentions with us. It would be an honor to carry your intentions to our Lady and our Lord. Just email Nancy at [email protected] and she will pass everything onto Katie so we can both be praying for YOU.

Your sisters in the small things,

Nancy and Katie

Mentioned in this episode:

Advent book study of Interior Freedom

Pray more Novenas

Katie’s new devotional for Catholic Women facing Infertility (15% off all November)

Flying Novenas ala Mother Teresa

St. Andrew’s Christmas Novena